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Milk, Milk, Milk!


6:15am the alarm clock goes off. I reach over and hit the snooze button, it does not stop the first time I hit the annoying device. I proceed to hit it once more still does not stop. I come up out of bed and reach over to throw the alarm clock across the room but in the brightest moment of the day I remember that my alarm clock is also a dock for my iPhone. It hits me, that is not my alarm clock at all, it is an incessant crying coming from the baby monitor.

I walk over and turn off what has now become the primary alarm clock for both Hot Mama and myself. It is my routine that when the Kid wakes up in the middle of the night to make a bottle for him. We have two different types of bottles ones that screw on the bottom and top and ones that just screw on the top. I find the sink and reach into the clean bottles and pull one out. I look at it and realize that I need to pull out the bottom too.

After finding the bottom I put both the bottom and bottle on the oven. Normally, I would screw on the bottom as I make the half a step to the oven from the sink. In a stroke of genius I forgot. I take another half-step behind me and open the door to the refrigerator, pull the milk out and take the another half-step to the oven. Unscrewing the milk top, I start to pour the milk into the bottle. Not know what is really going on I put the milk back into the fridge. When I come back to the bottle I see a small pool of milk on the bottom, it still has not occurred to me the mistake that I made. I think, “That is strange.” I look at the bottle and realize that I had not screwed the bottom onto the bottle.

Well now I am in a conundrum. How do I screw the bottom of the bottle on and keep the milk in the bottle? I can not screw the top on and just flip the bottle and not spill any milk. In another stroke of genius I decide that I have super-human powers and can pull the bottle up and slide the bottom on and defy the Laws of Gravity.

The Laws of Gravity defeated me in this battle. Milk was spilled all over the top of the oven and a new bottle had to be poured.

No sense in crying over spilled milk right?

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About The Rookie Dad

I am husband and father foremost. Secondly, I am a PBS producer and contribute to Traveling Dads and Dads Round Table.

Posted on May 11, 2012, in Friday FAIL and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Ugh. Been there….more than once. The half delirious state of wondering why the milk was coming out the bottom and going all over the counter.

  2. Many late evening-early mornings have been spent defrosting a bag of pumped breastmilk to fins that the bag had a small hole in it and the milk is mixed into the warm water… Not cool.

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