You Pooped In The Refrigerator?

What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole… wheel of cheese? How’d you do that? Heck, I’m not even mad; that’s amazing. How ’bout we get you in your p.j.’s and we hit the hay.     – Anchorman

I was not here for this event (it feels like lately I have been missing out on a lot of things… I wonder why?) So I can only imagine how this went down.

It was a lovely evening in the house. The Kid and Hot Mama spent the evening outside frolicking in the grass. For the Kid the evening was getting old and his eyes were getting heavy, but things needed to be done before he sleeps like a baby.

Hot Mama turns on the bath and then heads into the nursery to get the Kid ready. As soon as the Kid is naked he runs into the bathroom, as he knows what time it is… bath time!

It started out as a usual bath, the Kid was playing with his toys and sinking the Titanic, which ironically he loves it when the water from the sunken ship pours water all over his head. Just like Titanic’s maiden voyage, this bath was doomed.

The Kid starts to get red in the face, and in slow motion Hot Mama say’s


It was too late however, disaster struck. Hot Mama picks up the kid and drains the tub in an effort to get most of the treasure down the drain for easy clean up. Instead it spreads all over the drain making matters worse. Hot Mama cleans up the Kid and then walks back into the bathroom with wipes to start the disaster response process, which ends up going smoothly easing her.

Hot Mama then turns to her phone. I was at work rehearsing with our anchors what they would be saying at the end of the newscast, that part when the camera pulls away and you can not hear them only the music, we had decided on…

I’m gonna shoot you with a BB gun when you’re not looking. Yep, back of the head.      – Anchorman

My phone goes off, then everyone pulls out their iPhones to make sure it was not theirs. It was mine, with this text message…

Your son just took a dump in the bath!!!!!!!!!!

I could not help but laugh at this point. Hot Mama and I have had a conversation about this. I avoided getting pee’d on so naturally I needed to be the first when the Kid poop’s in the bath.

I can not help but wonder why I am not experiencing the joys of parenthood?

About The Rookie Dad

I am husband and father foremost. Secondly, I am a PBS producer and contribute to Traveling Dads and Dads Round Table.

Posted on April 17, 2012, in Parenting and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 6 Comments.

  1. Hearing about it is way funnier than being there. I feel bad for your wife. We no longer own any bath toys that have unwashable surfaces. Squirt toys and squeakers are gone too.

  2. I have to admit, I’m a little disappointed that there wasn’t actually any poop in the fridge. We actually have dodged the poo-bath bullet for both of the Twins so far. I know it’s bound to happen, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed.

  3. Poop ends up in the finest places. My son recently did this as well, but he went up on the little step in the tub and tried to get back in so there was a pile of poop just above him. It’s gross. Poop is gross in all forms and in all places except for out of smelling range. This is a funny post, even though I WAS hoping for poop in the fridge as well.

  4. I couldn’t stop laughing!!! I have not had this happen to me yet, but I am sure it will some day.

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