My Thoughts on the Duggar’s

Before anyone tells me that I have no compassion for losing a child, I do I feel for what has happened to the Duggar’s.   I can’t imagine what it would be like to go through something like this.  I hope that if Hot Mama and I do decide to have another we don’t have to deal with this.  I have had these thoughts before Michelle was pregnant and subsequently miscarried, the timing of this post may not be appropriate but here it is none-the-less.

But the Duggar’s have to many damn kids.  Maybe having a miscarriage was just the sign that they needed to stop getting busy in the bedroom.  19 kids is more then anyone can handle.

I will say that they do handle it well with the exception that I don’t know how the two of them can spend any time with any of their children.  I understand that the older kids help raise the little ones which is all well and good but do the little kids have any sort of parental attachment that is crucial as kids?

You have 19 kids and there are 24 hours in a day.  Let’s say you don’t sleep you get to spend just over an hour with each of your kids.  But all parents know that sleeping in very much needed!  Even I can attest to that and I only have one!

Not to mention the stress of dealing with a national television audience on a weekly basis! Imagine having a TV crew running around with you all day, look what it did for John and Kate!  Granted, they have a very religious background so I don’t see what went on with John and Kate going on with them.   Think about announcing to the world and to your family that you are expecting another child and then have a national audience reeling at every step as you deal with your miscarriage.  That’s gotta be tough.

Also with Josie their youngest, who was born premature at 25 weeks should also say that maybe it is time to slow it down.   Plus think about it, now their oldest is starting to have children and that kid will have aunts and uncles that are younger then she is!  That will be awkward at Christmas time… maybe not for the Duggar’s though.

There was even a blogger who wrote a letter of resignation from Michelle Duggar’s uterus, however that blogger took it down after hearing word of the miscarriage.  I think that maybe now her uterus might be saying that it can’t handle anymore!

Again, I do feel for what happened to the Duggar’s.  I don’t wish this upon anyone.  I can’t imagine losing the Kid.  I can’t imagine going through what they are going through right now.  But how much is to much?

About The Rookie Dad

I am husband and father foremost. Secondly, I am a PBS producer and contribute to Traveling Dads and Dads Round Table.

Posted on December 13, 2011, in Parenting and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.

  1. Let me preface my thoughts on the Dugars by saying, I am not religious though I was raised in a fire and brimstone strict religious household.
    The Dugars are shining example of what is wrong with religion. They are making a mockery out of their own supposed sacred set of beliefs. Having a few kids is being fruitful and multiplying. Having 20 is akin to saying the edict to turn the other cheeks means to go out of your way to get the shit stomped out of you.
    I agree, it is horrible that they lost a child, but it is okay to have sex just for the pleasure and intimacy it allows with your partner
    Ok, you can have your soap box back.

  2. I don’t think there is anything wrong with it. I personally think it’s too many damn kids and that they can probably walk out of her na-na, but they are self sufficient, pay for themselves and raise kind, caring children. Even though their religion is a tad weird in my eyes, as are some of their rules, they seem to be good people. I personally don’t think she should have any more for her health, and she probably only has a few good eggs left anyway, but if they want to- so be it.

  3. Their children seem happy, healthy, well educated, and close with each other and their parents. Obviously, mom and dad get enough time together at some point. As for parental time at home – neither parent works long days outside the home. I would bet their children get more face time than most families whose parents do work outside the home full time. I come from a family of 4 siblings – working parents – and I rarely got one-on-one time. I babysat my younger siblings. That is a typical family dynamic and I am just fine.

    It isn’t a life style I would choose, but I think there are more children and families in this world that need our attention. Abuse, poverty, neglect… all common in every city. A family that cares for their children well should be applauded, even if their choices are different than the ones we would make. It is ridiculous that people feel they have a right to tell them to stop having children. We live in a country with freedoms for a reason.

    If her health is a concern – it is her and her family to worry about – not yours or anyone else’s.

    • very well spoken. Usually the irreligious use the moral standard of, “if it doesn’t hurt anyone it’s okay”. I don’t think they are hurting anyone and are actually contributing to the good of society by raising self responsible children. People tend hate what they don’t understand. I say give them a break, let them grieve their loss, and learn some compassion.

  4. Here’s what I don’t understand. Instead of having more children (regardless of religion) how about adopting a child that doesn’t have a family or living on the streets? I’m not talking about going out of our country. We have enough Rock Stars and Actors handling that side. We need people to adopt children right here that aren’t infants, but 9 & 10.

    Yes, It is their own right to grow their family. Yet, if GOD blesses them with another pregnancy, maybe they could consider allowing a barren family a chance to adopt that child? Isn’t that just as GODLY? (The ultimate gift of birth?)

    Those are the thoughts that go through my head…AND how can the parents spend any individual time with each child? I agree. I wonder if they know each kid’s personal likes…colors/favorite books/movies/songs. You can’t tell me the children don’t desire one-on-one time.

  5. My take on this is- I can’t handle that! Well, it is admirable for the Duggars to have a family of 19 kids. They have their own right to grow their family and that should be the end of story. No judgements. I guess this is the fruit of a reality TV generation. We judge people because we see it on TV and we feel that we can do that as if it is fictional!

  6. I have an uncle that is 3 mos younger than me. It is what it is, for sure not a tragedy.

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