Our Society

I was watching a George Lopez stand up and he was talking about when he was growing up that he would fight with other kids as a 3rd grader.  This got me thinking about how today’s society has gotten EXTREMELY soft.  This has been an ongoing trend since I was in elementary school and that was only about 15 years ago.

In today’s society you can’t spank a kid without it being called child abuse!  Really?  I’ll be the first to come out and say it that I plan on spanking the chipmunk if he is out of control.    Teachers can’t even use a ruler to smack a student on the hands when they are out of control!  Ok maybe that was my dad’s catholic school upbringing.   If a teacher did that to me as a kid I would have sucked it up and dealt with it… probably told my parents… and their response would have been “well you deserved it.”  Yes, parents, if your child’s teacher punishes your student by smacking them on their hands they deserved it.  They were in the wrong and you need to teach your kid a lesson too!  If you think the teacher was out of line than think twice.   Look at how you are raising your kid.   Are you raising them to be a softy?  If you set the example by babying your child all the way through  school then yes your child will be a softy and grow to be dependent on you!

I remember getting in a fight in fifth grade and getting a bloody nose at school!   The fight I don’t remember what it was about but it was with my best friend at the time.   The teacher told my parents and I got punished.  I believe one of my parents spanked me, grounded me from TV, video games, playing with friends outside… and the later was actually the worse.   Now if a kid gets in a fight, one set of parents is off to sue to the school for not stopping the fight soon enough or they are suing the other parents.   If a teacher hits a student to bring that student back in line the parent immediately sues the school thinking that their child couldn’t have done any wrong.  What kind of message is that sending to our kids?    The message is that they can’t do any wrong… sorry parents but your child is not an angel and yes they can do wrong and do need to be punished by you!

The problem that our kids are growing up addicted to technology and not playing outside, getting their hands dirty making mud pies, starts with the parents.   The chipmunk, I expect to take fishing and teaching him how to put a worm on his hook.   I plan on taking him camping and learning how to start a fire without a match (I might need to refer to my boy scout handbook on that first).    What is so wrong about forcing our kids to go outside and play?  Are parents afraid that their kids will end up breaking an arm?  That’s part of growing up!  I remember riding my bike on dirt trails behind our house as a kid, getting shot with a BB gun, climbing trees, and exploring our neighborhood.   My parents welcomed that!  They wanted me to get outside!  I enjoyed going to boy scout camp and not taking a shower for 4 days!

I guess what I am trying to get at is that parents need to take responsibility!   You want to know why your kid doesn’t have any friends… well maybe they are to busy playing world of warcraft (world of warcrack).  Solution, force your kid to get outside and play with other kids!  Their comfort zone maybe on the computer but if they aren’t taken out of that zone then that is all they are going know. Want to know why your 16-year-old comes home crying after he got shoved into a locker?  Maybe that’s because he is afraid to stick up for himself because the parent has done that all along and his mommy was there to protect him.

Parents… please take control of your kid… spank them if you have to… it will be good for them… make them play outside…. get a broken arm or a bloody nose… it is just part of growing up!

About The Rookie Dad

I am husband and father foremost. Secondly, I am a PBS producer and contribute to Traveling Dads and Dads Round Table.

Posted on May 2, 2011, in Parenting and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 16 Comments.

  1. THANK YOU!!! I spank both of my kids. They need to know the difference between right and wrong. I used to go to an elementary school where (if your parents gave permission) they were allowed to paddle you for being bad. I had my mouth washed out with soap (a lot of good that did), was spanked and locked in my room or stood in a corner…

    And don’t you just love George Lopez- his specials are hilarious!

  2. I’ve been preaching this so much lately, especially with this whole “Stop Bullying” movement…in my day you were either the bully or you got bullied, plain and simple. I say I was spanked, always for a reason, and I turned out just fine. And I plan to put my kid in activities that encourage hard work, which does not include these little leagues that let everybody play and don’t keep score….what is that about? Without failure, the kid will NEVER try harder to get what they want.

    Oh, loving the new layout.

  3. Hi Brandon, I agree with you on many points in this post. Parents today are often looking for another person to blame for their child’s behavior, instead of taking responsibility for discipline themselves. Personally, however, I always parented with the mantra “People are not for hitting and kids are people too.” Now, I’m not saying don’t punish your kids. I’m saying find some way besides hitting, and something more appropriate to the offense than hitting. In a world where violence is more commonplace than we would like to acknowledge, why would a parent set an example of peace by hitting. There are other, more creative ways to discipline.

  4. I do not have children, yet (one day hopefully) but I definitely agree. My dad raised me and my sister alone, and if we got out of line -girl or not- we were spanked or grounded. If I fell off my bike, he told me to get back up and do it again. I climbed trees, went camping every other weekend and caught lightning bugs .. best times ever.

  5. Mostly agree with you: certainly on the points about technology and the outdoors…and certainly about the boundaries – as long as you’re not setting boundaries around his emotions…

  6. Adam Corolla has a funny rant about how soft our kids are in his book “Someday We’ll All Be Chicks”. He blames it on the removal of the gym rope and the humiliation we all had to endure when trying to climb it. You should check it out.

  7. Well said! You would love the book “Love, Warmth and Discipline” by Father Val Peters who runs Boys Town.
    I have an extra copy if you would like one?

  8. pinoyleonardo

    Well said man! Regarding technology, I really put a stop to the IPhoning by my 2 yr old daughter. Kids have to get out and play!

    Spanking for me will have to be the worst case scenario. As of now, it’s enough to raise my voice and my daughter knows I mean business.

    One time when my wife and I were talking to our daughter, we asked, how’s your teacher (in playgroup) then she acted out her one hand slapping the other and saying “Bad”. Whoa! We panicked. Turned out the teacher was telling my daughter to stop thumb sucking because ti was not good. LOL. Well, I still would not agree on carrot and stick in school. Motivation is better 🙂

    • I took this to the very extreme too. I won’t spank the chipmunk unless it is a last resort… and in public if he is acting up and won’t stop… I’m not going to be afraid to spank him. I don’t care what other people think, if they have a problem with it they can talk to me. Skinned knees, scrapes, and bruises are something I will expect from the chipmunk. That isn’t to say that if he doesn’t want to go outside I’m not going to make him but I will expect him to get out and about and play with his friends in the street.

  9. Reading your blog has inspired me to start my own…TY and keep doing what your doing.

  10. I agree with you in most of your points. I don’t really agree with siding with a teacher for smacking my kid though. I had a lot of very odd teachers that doled out punishments (non-physical) in misguided attempts to keep kids in line. I could only imagine if they were allowed to physically punish us. Many of them were not parents themselves and had no emotional attachment to their students. I spank my son when I feel it is necessary, but when that bond is removed, it becomes a little harder to spank appropriately. I am all for spanking your child, but if a teacher ever laid a hand on my children, I may have to seek and destroy.

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