Bad Dad

Ok something has been bothering me lately.  It something about me, personally.   I don’t know why I have been this way, I realize part of it is because of the recent happenings in my life that I have been dealing with, but I’m healing from those and I’m healing faster then some people thought.

I’ve been a bad dad.  I haven’t been helping my wife in the ways that I should be.  She is going back to work this week and she is exhausted,  I can tell.  I haven’t been waking up in the middle of the night to either make a bottle or change a diaper.   My two only defenses in this argument are that it does hurt me sometimes to get up out of bed since my chest is still hurting just alittle bit and I’m a very heavy sleeper.  There are many times when she says that she didn’t get much sleep because Will was up all night and I didn’t even know it.   According to my New Year’s resolutions, I haven’t been living up to number 2 and we are only a couple days into the new year.

With my wife going back to work I am going to have to pick up how I am a dad.   I need more diapers changes (and chances to be pee’d on since I haven’t yet), more play time, and more feeding time.  My wife I’m sure has become overwhelmed and resentful having to take care of it all right now.

I have become the father I didn’t want to be.  The guy that doesn’t interact with his son, the dad that just sits on the sidelines while the resentful wife takes care of everything.  I don’t want that.  I’m changing right now!  I’ve said it before, but with the recent events in my life I’ve become serious about some of the things I need to change, and this is it.

About The Rookie Dad

I am husband and father foremost. Secondly, I am a PBS producer and contribute to Traveling Dads and Dads Round Table.

Posted on January 3, 2011, in Fatherhood and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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